There is a Specific Kind of Boy I Dislike

I mean, I dislike boys in general (they’re gross and have cooties) but the type I won’t even consider liking are present in droves at my university. My mother says it’s because it’s a public university, and so you get “all types” of people there. I tell her that she is being classist, and by extent, racist. She just rolls her eyes.

Anyway, this type of boy hates women. Oh, he thinks he loves women, *traces vaguely feminine shape with hands* *makes noises of approval*, but he really just loves the idea of women as portrayed to him by the media and society in general, and his family in specific – docile, submissive, brainless, yet interesting, independent, and multifaceted. The only point consistent in this superwoman he believes all women to be is that they/she cater to his every need, regardless of her own. The self-sacrificing woman who understands that he is the superior being who is so in awe of his manliness that she gives up her family, her friends, and her identity for him. Her existence – and by extension, the existence of every women, because we are a monolith – can only be validated by him, and if she – we – cannot win his approval, she has failed in her purpose in life.

This kind of boy can be very, for lack of a better term, liberal in most of his politics: the only oppressive force he either fails to see or fails to give importance to is that of the patriarchy. He is the type of boy who will take pictures of you at a public place without your permission, then pout and say you are overreacting when you ask him to delete them. He is the type of boy who will come over to your department during break for “the view ;)” and then say “these girls are full of themselves, we didn’t come here to stare at them“.

He is the type of boy who will refuse to curse in front of you because “you don’t do that in front of girls” but won’t hesitate to mimic fucking you to his buddies when he thinks you can’t see. He is the type of boy who tells you when his friends treat you like a fuck toy, but won’t explain why they thought they could say things like that in front of him.

He is the type of boy who will harass you in public places and then charm your mother at private gatherings so that she doesn’t object to his rishta – which he will send through his parents, of course, because he’s respectable.

He is the type of boy who will reinforce through his words and actions that he is aware of the unfair power structures which govern your life as a woman, and he will gaslight you so that those structures continue to benefit him and continue to paint you as an emotional, illogical harpy.

There is no hope for these boys. Circumvent them like you would dog shit on the pavement.


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